What is an Elopement? Busting Common Myths

To elope or not to elope? That, my friends, is the big question these days. Especially for couples who are on the fence. Whaddya say we get you off that elopement fence (it looks super uncomfortable) by poking majorly needed holes in these all-too-common elopement myths?

Let’s do it!

intimat wedding on gambier island

Myth #1: Elopements Are Rushed or Last Minute

*Ahem* Is this thing on? I need to make sure the people in the back can hear me. Choosing to elope does not mean getting married in a way that’s rushed, last-minute, or less than compared to a big wedding.

Because—allow me to be crystal clear and a little sassy on behalf of badass elopement couples—for introverts, minimalists, and people who don’t love the spotlight, elopements are the shit. Not a rush job, a backup plan, or a second choice.

Elopements are planned out just as much as big weddings are. Actually, they’re often planned way more intentionally. That’s thanks to details like being able to say your vows in a place that’s super special to you vs having to choose a venue based on your guest list. Or include an adventure as part of your day vs “shoulding” your way to the expected cocktail hour and lawn party.

Myth #2 Eloping Is Selfish

Yeeeeah, no. I can hardly even entertain this one! The decision to elope is the furthest thing from selfishness. It’s a brave call that couples make with care, intention, and tons of heart.

If you’re eloping, you have made the sometimes controversial decision to plan a day that includes everything you love wholeheartedly, while letting go of every single “should” and “have to” that society shoves down our throats in the process. In my books, that’s courageous and authentic AF. So please please please, don’t let anyone tell you that eloping is selfish.

Related: How To Tell Your Family You’re Eloping

 
eloping in queen elizabeth park
 

Myth #3 Eloping Is Cheaper

Sometimes eloping is cheaper, sure. But depending on why you’re eloping and what you want to keep, add, or let go, making this decision may or may not save you money on your wedding costs. The cost of eloping is 100% unique to each couple, so really it’s up to you.

While you won’t have to feed 100 people, pricing for certain wedding day essentials, like outfits and photographers, won’t change whether you’re eloping or having a big wedding. Plus, maybe it’s not about what you subtract, but what you add to your elopement. Like maybe you splurge on a once-in-a-lifetime experience like taking a floatplane to Vancouver Island or booking a private snowmobiling tour of backcountry Whistler! I’m here for any of all of it.

If you’re looking to save money by eloping, power to you. You can certainly find ways to spend less. But if you’re eloping for reasons that aren’t budgetary at all, know that you don’t have to dial in the celebrations. It’s your wedding day, so it deserves as much pomp and circumstance as you can afford to and want to give it. There’s no shame in saving and there’s definitely no shame in going all out, no matter the size of your guest list.

Myth #4 It’s Just The Two Of You

Okay, sometimes this is a myth and sometimes it’s not. It will vary from couple to couple. Some people choose to make their elopements private, intimate affairs with only their witnesses, officiant, and photographer there to share the day. Others include a small number of ride-or-die guests. It all comes down to who you are and who you feel close enough with to include on your wedding day.

Going back and forth on the idea of having guests? Here are some ideas of ways you can include your families and friends to share your joy:

1) Keep most of the day private, and invite them to join you for a celebratory meal at the end of the night.

2) Throw a post-elopement party on the big day or a few weeks later.

3) Allow the fam to join you, but just for the ceremony or vow exchange on your special day.

Myth #5: 2 Hours of Photography Is Enough

Some couples think that a smaller wedding requires less photography coverage. And truthfully, in some cases, like if you really are just bangin’ out the vows at city hall then heading back to work for the afternoon, this can be true. But even at that, there are details that would be missed with just a few hours’ coverage. Things like waking up and sipping a mimosa in your PJs, getting ready (together or separately), and the post-nuptial brewery tour you embark on later that day.

Remember, this is the day you’re committing your life to your best friend in the whole world. It just might be the best day of your life, too (so far, anyway). So really consider if you want to “rip off the band-aid” or if you’d rather make the entire day extra special.

I’ve found that most of my elopement couples opt for my Growler package, which includes 6 hours of photography. It’s the perfect amount of time to capture your whole day, from that first sip of coffee to the sunset toast. Sound good? Email me for a pricing guide with full deets.

Request My Pricing Guide

Let Me Help You Get This Day Right

Your elopement day will be the knock-down, drag-out, amazing day you want it to be if you keep the focus on the things that matter the most: the two of you, any ride-or-dies who make the guest list, a couple of rings if you’re into that, and a photographer who’s ready and willing to photograph the hell outta your day.

Want that photographer to be me? Sweet, I do too! Book a consultation call and let’s make sure we’re the perfect fit. Over beers or coffees, in person or on Zoom—your choice!

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Why Mamas Need To Be In Photos, Too

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10 Common Questions About Elopement Photography